The Double J

I had some Jimmy John's for lunch the other day. Let me just say this: it should be illegal for sandwiches to be that good. Honestly. Cold cuts with lettuce, tomato, cheese, and mayo should not taste as wonderful as that sandwich did. I'm thinking that the laws of physics have been violated here. Oh, and by the way, that slogan is 100% accurate. The purveyors of said sandwich created this masterpiece so fast, I freaked. I'm almost certain that superhuman ability was somehow utilized in order to bring this culinary delight into existence. If there is a weakness for this superpower (as there is for every power) I will fight the forces of evil for no other reason than to prevent such deliciousness from danger. This sandwich was that good!

There's really no good way to segue into this next topic so I'll just soldier on.

Smokers.......I get it. You're going to smoke no matter what statistics are thrown at you. There's nothing I can do about it. There's nothing those "Truth" ads on TV can do about it. It's all about addictions and I've got my own to deal with (over eating). So, my glass house will, henceforth, go unbroken by any stones thrown from the inside (but I will hunt down anyone hurtling stones from the outside). However.......we still have some unfinished business to discuss, smoking community. Two things, to be exact.

1. Illinois Law now dictates any smoking that does take place in the vicinity of a public building must happen at least 15 feet from the entrance. You know what that means? It means 15 feet. As in, no more second-hand smoke drifting into my kids' stroller while we're trying to enjoy some fresh air outside of the Cracker Barrel as we wait for our table to be ready.

2. A cigarette butt (I said butt) is litter! It is absolutely unacceptable to throw it on the ground ANYWHERE! I cannot express this enough, people. I simply do not understand how a civilized person can think that there is nothing wrong with this. Seriously, would anybody say something to me if I just discarded a Taco Bell wrapper onto the curb in front of Wal Mart? Is the pope Catholic?

Da Summer

Like much of the moviegoing public, I very much look forward to what the summer has to offer us from a cinematic perspective. Iron Man was officially released today and so begins the season (once again, from a cinematic perspective). Is it just me, or does it seem as if the proverbial load has been shot a bit early? Yes, I have been looking forward to this film for quite some time, but I tend to think that a film of this magnitude (a.k.a. the long awaited comic book adaptation) should be saved for a little later in the season. No, I'm not complaining. Just commenting. Take it as you will.

However, I do have a complaint to register to you, the general public. Am I the only one who does not see a red light as an oppurtunity to do anything but pay attention to when said light will change to green? Does it not annoy anyone else when permission has been given by the almighty traffic signal to continue on one's path and the frontmost motorist has not noticed because he/she (most likely "she") has failed to notice this phenomenom because they are too busy looking for something on the floor/trying to find the easy listening station on the radio/checking out their teeth in the rearview mirror/doing their taxes? The solution? Automobile manufacturers need to install a device that causes their vehicles to automatically move forward (at a decent speed) once the light changes. Think about it. What would cause a person to pay more attention, the annoyed honking of those travellers being held up by the offender's lack of attentiveness, or the sensation that one is in forward motion with no control over the situation? I'd say the hands would spring to the wheel and the mind would return to where it belongs right quick! Oh, but it is a dreamworld in which I live.

On to some reader comments (of the audio persuasion!)



Wow. Just......wow. I'll chalk this one up as a blatant rib towards the last entry I received. Made me laugh, though, so job well done, caller!

And on to number two.....



Definitely from the same person. Alright, I'll be honest. I know this caller (and, indeed, consider him to be one of my best friends). So, I can't claim complete ignorance of what's going on here. I'll just leave the rest up to your imagination, dear reader.




Da Cuteness