I Just Don't Understand....

I had always prayed that the day would never come. I had a tendency to fool myself into entertaining thoughts such as, "That kind of foolishness only happens in the movies and on television. Surely, real people in real places have the presence of mind to hold their tongues!" However, last evening I found myself in the proverbial "School of the Real World". The class: "Difficult People 101". You see, last night at an Applebee's my family received our first dose of discrimination due to our son's disorder.

Let me back up for a moment and give a brief history lesson for those of you not "in the know". In June of 2007 my son, Colin, was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. I won't go into all the details here (click on the underlined), but Colin struggles with the concept of transition. Now, to the naked eye Colin just looks like your typical 4 year old boy.

We feel blessed beyond understanding at this fact, but it comes with a price. You see, when Colin is having a difficult time in a public place there is really no way for a complete stranger to know (barring explicit disclosure) that my son is experiencing a tough moment due to his mental incapacity and not because he is simply a "rotten brat".

Which brings me back to last night. We arrived at our dining destination and I took our younger son, Jaxon, in to the restaurant while Kyla stayed with Colin in order to "give him a minute" and acclimate himself to the new surroundings. During this time I took the opportunity to put Jaxon in his seat. As I did so, I couldn't help but overhear the woman at the table behind us as she complained to her server about the state of her steak. I should have been able to predict what would follow.

A few moments later Kyla was carrying a screaming boy to our table. She hadn't even gotten him in his seat when I heard from behind me,

"Oh great! So glad we got seated here!" Can you just taste the sarcasm leaping off of your monitor?

Well, about 30 seconds passed and Colin had not quite calmed down. Again, this woman felt the need to have her voice heard.

"Why don't they just take him to the bathroom and slap him around until he behaves?"

I only wish I was relaying this in jest. That is what she actually said. Now, whether she intended for me to hear or not, I heard her loud and clear. And I was not about to let such an ignorant, foolish statement go unanswered.

"Excuse me. He has Autism."

And, not even a second passed as I got this bullet in the head:

"Then you should think before you take him out in public!"

"This is a family restaurant!"

With my blood boiling I turned around and came to the decision that there was a good chance that Jesus was about to be misrepresented unless I got OUT. So, I did just that. I lifted my sorry carcass out of my chair and made my way out to the van to "pull it together". Soon, Kyla brought Colin out to me so that he could have some more time to calm himself as well. And I have no shame, dear reader, when I admit to you that I wept. How could someone speak in such a cruel manner? It's one thing to speak one's mind about parenting ability. It's something else altogether when a child's strong reaction is explained and met with words of hatred. I held my son and apologized to him for all the times I have lost patience. Soon, Kyla texted me to tell me that the lady had left. I played a game with Colin to get him laughing and soon we made our way back to our table with my son smiling from ear to ear. The rest of the evening was quite enjoyable.

I keep asking myself what might have happened had I not taken myself out of the situation. I truly shudder to think. However, the more important question has the most obvious answer. What was this woman's problem? She needs Jesus. I don't care how cheesy that might sound. I really don't. I only hope that someone gets a chance to share with her because I blew it.

Enough with da seriousness.

A Much Needed Apology

You know, I usually go out of my way to make people laugh. I have always been of the mindset that we need not always take ourselves too seriously. However, sometimes when taking that journey "out of my way" I tend to forget that I run the risk of hitting a few pedestrians.

You see, yesterday I found out that by importing these posts to Facebook the number of people who partake in the reading of my little musings increases dramatically. In turn, the risk of "hitting a few pedestrians" rises as well.

Having said that, I feel the need to apologize for the post that went up yesterday. You needn't try to look it up because I took it down. While I'm a firm believer in the importance of a sense of humor I cannot overlook the fact that not everyone is going to appreciate my brand. There's a fine line between a joke that gets a laugh and sarcasm that stings. Yesterday's post had it's feet planted a bit too firmly on the latter. If anyone of you were offended I am truly sorry.

I promise to be more sensitive in the future.

But, I'm still gonna be funny!

Been a long time since I blogged and rolled

I know what you're thinking. "Well well well, look who finally decides to make an appearance. Almost five months since the last blog and now you expect us all to just jump at the 'opportunity' to read one of your 'wonderful' posts?"

Well, yes, actually I do. And, by the way, I'm picking up on your sarcasm. And that's good because you're laying it on pretty thick. (I knew I could get your attention with a random "Tommy Boy" quote.)

So, the question I'm sure that all you loyal readers (all five of you) are asking yourselves is one of these three possibilities.

1. Z, where have you been all this time?
2. Why come back now?
3. What was the name of the bad guy from Tron?

And the answers, in no particular order, are:

1. Because I was looking at my previous posts and realized how much I actually enjoy this "blogging" thing.
2. Zark.
3. Right here in Mattoon.

I'll let you decipher the correct correspondence of the question to answer algorithm there. And, yes, I just used a big word and care not whether it was used in the correct context.

Seriously, though, I should apologize for the lengthy absence. But, I won't. Instead I'll just make a flimsy promise to try harder to post at a more regular interval.

Here's this post's piece of "self-destructive evangelism"


Does everyone remember the "billboards from God" craze from a few years ago? Well, it looks like Calvary Tabernacle United Pentecostal Church has just taken it to the 21st century! They may as well just take the church doors off the hinges with all of the lost people this sign is going to attract!

"Hey! This church mentions Facebook! I'm sooooo there!"

Alright, that's enough out of me.